Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Cleaning House

I am a part time stay at home mom and a part time working mom. With that I sometimes feel overwhelmed with the duties that come along with both.
Don’t get me wrong I love staying at home with my son but I also love going to work on the weekends and escaping the mundane chores of keeping a house hold together.

The last couple of months have been very difficult for me. I have been married for two ½ years but I have been together with my husband Cody for 5 ½ years and most of those years have been great but a lot of them have been hard. It’s defiantly a tuff road working on a relationship.

 I started dating Cody when I was 18ish and we got engaged when I was 19 married when I barley turned 21 got pregnant 10 months after.

Now I know if it was up to Cody we wouldn’t have gotten married at such a young age. He always told me that he didn’t think he would get married until he was 25 and he didn’t want kids until 30. But me, being who I am I wanted what I wanted now! NO IFS ANDS OR BUTTS!
So of course for him to stay in this relationship he needed to GIVE ME THAT RING which he did do.
But I do sometimes wonder if he thinks back on that and regrets asking me just to keep me with him. Because there have been fights where he has said that he doesn’t know why he married me and I reply as followed “you are the one who went down on one knee and ASKED I didn’t make you.”

But I did.
I wanted a wedding I wanted that day that every girl dreams of and if it was with him then fine. Don’t get me wrong I did love him then and I do love him now.
I am the type person who when I want something I do whatever I can to get it what I ended up doing to get me a baby was bribing Cody with the thought that he would get a very nice expensive name brand watch.
(It was low I see that now.)

But I wanted a baby and he wasn’t feeling it. So I made him a deal.
Has he gotten a watch that he wanted yet? No, we have a baby to pay for! DUH!
But will he? Maybe.
Can I promise him that he ever will? Probably not.
Does he love his son? Yes, 100%
Did he hold it against me? Yes.
Does he now? I think sometimes he still does.

This past year having a baby that I made damn well sure that I got even though we weren’t that ready caused some problems which made me and Cody lose sight of each other.

I feel like I was 100% meant to be a mother it came easily and natural to me. But to Cody it was the opposite he didn’t know what to do with Wyatt how to hold him refused to change diapers and he never heard him in the middle of the night when he was crying

So I did it 90% of the time on my own.

Cody has always had these “problems” meaning that he has manic depressant anxiety disorder. All though he refuses to admit that he does he does.

When we were at the beginning of our relationship Cody would lock himself in the bathroom and sit in the dark holding himself in the fetal position because I would get mad that he didn’t take out the garbage. So add a baby to the mix and you get someone who doesn’t really help you out.

 But by the time Wyatt was 10 months I couldn’t handle it anymore so I left. But I couldn’t bear to be without Cody So I came back after a week. we both had to take a look back at ourselves and decide what we needed to do to keep us together and to keep our family together. And stop blaming each other and the one thing that requested was for me was to clean.

Clean? You’re asking you self yes, clean.

I am lazy no doubt about it. I don’t care if that sock stays on the floor for a week or if the laundry is still in the dryer. And those dishes piled up? I might get to them I might not.

Maybe just maybe when I have run out of every dish in the house I will consider it.

UGH! Me, thinking to myself about how I need to clean and watch Wyatt and cook dinner and do this and that and blah blah blah… It was overwhelming.

How do I go about this?
How do I have time to do this?
WHY do I have to do this?

But I know that I needed too. I needed to be the wife that Cody wanted and I needed to be better at managing my time.

If I can put my one year old on a schedule then why can’t I put myself on one too?
So who do you go to when you need advice on how to be a housewife?
Your Mom right?

My mom was a stay at home mom with 7 kids so she mastered it all and what she gave me has saved my life.
She handed me a box that held in it a gold mine.

It was a box filled with note cards. The first set of note cards was your “daily tasks” things that must be done every day. The next ones were “weekly task” one thing you do each day such as Monday- clean bathroom Tuesday-clean kitchen (but in detail of exactly how.) and so forth. Next “biweekly” these are the big chores you do every couple of weeks. And then ones that are called “Aladdin cards” these are chores that only take 15 min NO MORE to complete.

I know some of you are asking yourself really?

You need cards to tell you what to do?



Plus I also have 1 year old who consumes my time and then my love for the DVR doesn’t help either.

 Have these cards worked?

Oh yes, just ask Cody

Does He come home to a nice clean house? Yes.

Daily? Eehh… I’m getting there.


  1. LOL @ the last line. :D I love the note card idea. I am going to do it. But knowing me I'd lose actual note cards so I'm going to list them as a Word document on my computer. :D

  2. You should really do it. It has helped me out so much its unbelievable. If you need to know what to write on the cards or anything else let me know. :)

  3. I would love a copy of your note cards. I'm so lazy as well, but I AM getting better. But having a plan or "small steps" really help me.
    If you wouldn't mind emailing me, that would be great!
    vmstrickland at gmail dot com

  4. I would love a copy of your note cards. I'm so lazy as well, but I AM getting better. But having a plan or "small steps" really help me.
    If you wouldn't mind emailing me, that would be great!
    vmstrickland at gmail dot com

  5. I just found your blog, I have no idea how lol just through random blog browsing, and decided to back track to the beginning of this one. And I was just wondering, is there ANY way I could get a copy of that entire card system? I just know it would do wonders if I had a replica of what your mom gave you. If so, and you don't mind then I'll list my email. If you do, I definitely understand! Anyway I am looking forward to reading through your blog. :)

    My email in case you're willing to send a copy..

    1. Whitney, I will look for them. A lot has changed in my life since this but when I stayed home more I loved them. I will search for them and get them to you as soon as I can. :)


Thanks for reading. Take a moment to comment, so I can personally thank you.