Cody and I had a talk last night about the kid in the belly and the boy that we call Wyatt. It started off talking about how weird it is going to be to have another one and how we cant imagine what it will be like, then it drifted off to how nervous it makes us which then led to us talking about me and working again.
While I was pregnant with Wyatt I worked full time had only two weeks off after he was born and then went back to work full time again. I worked full time hours for a few months and then made the choice to go part time because I notice how difficult it was for Cody to care for Wyatt as a new born. In a way I am glad that I stepped into a part time role but also it was more difficult for us then finically. Cody was and still is an excellent provider but you can only do so much with one income.
So for the first year of Wyatt’s life I stayed home during the week and worked the weekends. Cody last night talked about how he is worried that with me working that I will not be here to teach the new kid how I taught Wyatt. Then he said how it makes him upset that now since I am working I don't do the same things I did with Wyatt when he was little and that he is not being taught anything new.
Man, talk about throwing me into some mom guilt. Thanks. I know that I have talked so much on here about working full time and the stress of trying to be a mom, wife and a full time employee and how it can be hard to juggle it and that most days I wished I’d stay home but when Cody said that I become very defensive.
I do a damn good job at raising Wyatt. He is smart, listens really well and is quite funny and just because I am a working mom does not mean that I don't spend time with him. I mean my days are filled with the worry of Wyatt and if he is being fed, bathed, taught, paid attention too. I pick the right people to take care of him when I have to be at work and I demand that they also care about all those things too and that on the days that he needs me more, work is the last thing on my mind.
I turn down vacations alone with friends, I don't go out every weekend and on my days off they are filled with what fun things am I going to do with Wyatt. If I have to go do errands on my days off I don't make Wyatt go to a babysitters I take him with me.
Who says that working mom’s cant raise their children to be amazing adults. What is the difference of me being home 24/7? Maybe the house would be cleaner and I’d cook more meals but really I would expect Wyatt to be just how he is and learning just what he is learning. I aint going to hold his hand around the house and I wouldn't want him around me at every second because my god does he need to learn to be able to entertain him self because people aren't going to do that for him.
I do understand Cody’s fear though. This kid (the baby) is going to have a different start then Wyatt did but don’t all second kids do? I was a fresh mom with Wyatt I bought all new things, had to have the most expensive stuff, I maybe held him to long and picked him up at every cry. I mean what new mother doesn't?
But I get it now, I get what is needed and what isn't. I will be the mother that is needed even if that means that I have to work or who knows maybe I will make that choice to stay home after the kid is born but regardless I think working moms get a bad rap.
Just because we work to help provide a better life for our children doesn't mean that we are any different then the stay at home moms. Because I know when I stayed home I had the same worries that I do now as a working mom. I just get to juggle more.Tweet