Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Hello New Year


When December 21 rolled around I was secretly hoping that the world would end. Not end in the since of it not being here anymore but that all the responsibilities would magically disappear. Like the idea of having a job would no longer be required. Where some how the world would reset and living off the land would be more important then living with all the corporate bull shit I deal with at work.

I saw my self finding a little cabin off in the mountains with Wyatt and Cody and we would be there together sitting next to a warm fireplace that was burning because of the hard work we did together gathering the firewood. I saw myself in a kitchen cooking while Wyatt sat on the rug placed on the the woodened floors playing with blocks as Cody sat in his recliner reading because that was all that we could do to entertain ourselves.

And when December 22 came. I was disappointed.  Disappointed, that I would still have to report to work that day. That I would leave my home where my child was and where the husband was sleeping to go to place that matter nothing to me.

A place that required me to put on a happy face and push paperwork and input data that meant nothing outside of my office walls and all the while it took me away from my happy. My family, my child, my art, my photography, my soul.

So this year, I am going to find my happy again.

My goals are to find away to not work but still be able to take care of my family. I want to write more, draw and maybe start painting again. I want to rediscover the joy of photography with my big girl camera. I want to take trips with friends. I want to discover places I have never seen locally and non locally. I want to hold a squishy baby that is mine, I want to see how Wyatt would be as a big brother and I want to cuddle with my husband more.

I am determined to find my happy again and I think it starts with quitting my job.

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